I haven’t really restricted in a long time—at least not the way I used to. Sometimes I eat less—because I’m not hungry—but I don’t eat teeny tiny amounts. However, I admit to still being obsessed with calorie counting. Right now, my magic number seems to be 1300—a number I can maintain my current weight at. I’ll also admit to still being underweight, but only by about 8 lbs and my doctor approved of my weight at my last visit so I think I’m okay.
So basically, I plan my meals ahead of time. Sometimes a day ahead, oftentimes a week ahead. I try to convince myself it’s because I’m in college and I have to keep my food supply in check, but I honestly think it’s my ED speaking up again. But maybe not.
I plan exactly what I’m going to eat at each meal and write it down somewhere. I take into account how many calories it is when I add everything together. Breakfast and lunch must be 300 each, snacks about 100-150 each (I have two a day) and dinner usually ends up being 350. Of course, this doesn’t add up to 1300—it’s always about 50-150 calories less. Is this a problem? I’m not sure, but I think that if I continually eat 100 calories less than I need, I will lose weight, albeit slowly.
So I try to eat 1300 calories (it doesn’t always happen), but then I also think about exercising, too. Some remnants of my ED remain—I do a couple hundred sit-ups a day and jogging in place for a few minutes a day, too. Plus, being a college student, I have to walk everywhere, so I probably get in at least a half hour of walking on a school day. I’m honestly not quite sure how much I’m actually burning. Of course, my anorexia tells me it’s not enough, but the real me thinks I probably should eat a bit more.
Do you plan meals, too? Do you take into account calories when planning? Is it a problem, or does it help you stick with a plan?